Christien Brinkgreve wrote in her book Het beladen huis (The Burdened House), which I posted about earlier, about those moments when "agree to disagree" seems to have become a kind of permanent address.

And then there's that difficult choice: do I stay or do I go?

The difference?

Perseverance sounds noble. You keep hoping for a different outcome. Maybe things will change, maybe everything will turn out okay. Perseverance is hope in disguise.

And persevere?

That is endurance. Staying put, not because you hope things will change, but because you love the other person more than you love yourself. Because you understand more than is good for you. Because silence seems easier than speaking up.

Perseverance is not everything, but acceptance is. It often requires more love, or perhaps more fear, than we realize.

The bridge in the middle

The best part? You can stand together in the middle of the bridge and say, "This 'agree to disagree' has gone on long enough, don't you think?"

That's not defeat. That's maturity.

Become curious about your own patterns. What do you persevere with? What do you stick with? And what is the difference between the two in your life?

Not easy questions.

Curiosity is allowed.

Will you leave the table empty or will you join us again...